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  Job | Questionnaire
Faced with the Ark questionnaire, Job gave a characteristically downbeat response. Short, terse answers. Talk about skin problems. Hard-to-pronounce books from the Bible. So read on for the lowdown.
Full name:

Like to be known as:
Odd Job.

Timeless (or middle-aged).

What are three essential aspects of your perfect day?
Sleeping in, eating well, talking to G-d.

What are your favorite topics of conversation?
My troubles, your troubles, G-d's troubles.

What books would you bring into the Ark?
"Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?"; "Stranger in a Strange Land"; "Stupid White Men".

How about music?
Brahms Violin Concerto, Bach Passacaglia and Fugue, "What if G-d Was One of Us?" (Joan Osborne).

What extra items are you trying to smuggle into your Ark suitcase?
Skin lotion; pictures of the kids.

What are your best qualities?
Patience (as if you didn't already know).

And your worst habits?
Interrupting others.

List your favorite books in the Bible.
Ezekiel, Philippians.

Share with us your top tips for living.
Hang in there. Cheer up – things could be worse (so I cheered up, and sure enough...).

And finally – which do you prefer: cats or dogs?
Dogs for company, cats for consolation.

The Ark © 2003
*Samson not drawn to scale